Today I am 28.
It's odd. I don't feel my age. But who really does, right?
Today's been a great day. Ange (my friend/current roommate) made me pancakes for breakfast. And she made me dinner. She did more for me that my bf last year (of 3+ years) did. I went for drinks with friends.
I came home and have been reflective and indecisive and much like myself.
I'm in a weird spot lately and not sure what to do with it because I know the consequences of all my possible outcomes and I don't like any of them so I'm not doing anything. Wow, that sounds like everything I always say. Dammit it sucks when you have to be vague and censor yourself on your own blog because you don't want to admit anything to yourself.
Suffice it to say this: I am stuck having feelings for the person that would be perfect for me like, 5 years from now. I'm not ready for that, he's not ready for that. I know that pursuing something would mess it all up. Neither of us are in the right place for it to work and I refuse to lose what we DO have for the sake of something that I know will ultimately fail.
Maybe you know who I'm talking about. It's probably not much of a stretch.
So guess what I'm going going to do: Continue dating/going after the boys I'm not meant to be with. Partly because I know it's easier than giving up my heart. Partly because it's amusing and fun to meet new people. Partly because thats what I always do.
Welcome to 28. It's exactly like all the years before.
It's odd. I don't feel my age. But who really does, right?
Today's been a great day. Ange (my friend/current roommate) made me pancakes for breakfast. And she made me dinner. She did more for me that my bf last year (of 3+ years) did. I went for drinks with friends.
I came home and have been reflective and indecisive and much like myself.
I'm in a weird spot lately and not sure what to do with it because I know the consequences of all my possible outcomes and I don't like any of them so I'm not doing anything. Wow, that sounds like everything I always say. Dammit it sucks when you have to be vague and censor yourself on your own blog because you don't want to admit anything to yourself.
Suffice it to say this: I am stuck having feelings for the person that would be perfect for me like, 5 years from now. I'm not ready for that, he's not ready for that. I know that pursuing something would mess it all up. Neither of us are in the right place for it to work and I refuse to lose what we DO have for the sake of something that I know will ultimately fail.
Maybe you know who I'm talking about. It's probably not much of a stretch.
So guess what I'm going going to do: Continue dating/going after the boys I'm not meant to be with. Partly because I know it's easier than giving up my heart. Partly because it's amusing and fun to meet new people. Partly because thats what I always do.
Welcome to 28. It's exactly like all the years before.
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